Sunday, June 04, 2006

The Bridge of Self

I've been doing viewing practice in an experimental series. You do a brief chakra meditation first, then focus on a given chakra, on intensifying its energy and asking 'through' that chakra for info. At each chakra you give yourself two or three prompts, writing/sketching data after each. The prompts are whatever you like but should be the same all the way through. I use 'tell me something that matters about this target' and 'give me what is most important about this target'. So far it has worked well enough. The change of chakra works like a new prompt, bringing new data. By the time I get to the end, if I've three prompts, it can be an hour. The data develops much as it does in any other model. The goal is to see if, over time and compilation, data of certain types (or via a certain perception-type) comes through more/less at certain chakras, or is more/less accurate at some. If nothing else a side effect is more chakra exercise.

I put the Narnia soundtrack on again (on my MP3 player with earbuds, gosh I love that thing, and how I love that soundtrack!) and did an inner guide meditation. I asked him to take charge of whatever he felt most needed doing on my part. He took my arm and we appeared on my bridge. That's the lonnnnng one, the high suspension bridge that seems to represent "me" and the length of it, this life. (I thought I had my meditations from the beginning of the year online to refer to but I see I don't. Dang. Well anyway...) It's a conscious-dream-construct, except spontaneous (the best kind). We appeared far from where I was last time. A good section of the bridge had nothing but some odd-looking light-colored cable-like shapes holding it together. Nearly the entire bridge at that point was "burned out" from underneath. Such a grevious wound. I wondered what part of my life or body (or both) this represented, but decided the point really was fixing it. My third of four, the captain overseeing the bridge reconstruction, came up beside me. My mate in the 'four' symbology, I looked at him and oozed love for awhile. Then I went back to the focus. It required a lot of effort, channeling energy and intent through me into some format that flowed and became the construction material to reconstruct the bridge. Finally it seemed all completed.

I turned to my guide, ready to leave, and I was falling asleep at that point, and there it went... I was about one molecule from sleep when my entire right-side of body gave a fantastic jerk so powerful it shocked me instantly awake and I looked up--to see my senior (the first of four), he was staring at me from inches away from my face, and I understood that he had 'caused' this massive physical abreaction, to get my attention and wake me up. I felt this large emotion difficult to articulate, but some degree of 'shocked awe-based fear' was involved because I had never realized that this 'spiritual aspect of me' could so physically affect my body.

"Join us inside the castle," he said. "More often. Come to the tower." In my sacred space used to be this tiny palisade that grew into a big castle when I wasn't looking last January. The four of us live in it, in a hilariously Narnia-like relationship that I swear I never grokked until this year, despite that my relationship with them has gone on since 1994. I sometimes go to the roof of the castle, and look out over a big river below and way off into the distant mountains. I don't go inside, after the early January meditations. I don't know why. I just haven't felt... like it was mine yet, somehow. I have never been in any part I would call 'the Tower'. But I guess I have to go. His... requests don't really allow argument.

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