Aldous Huxley's "Perennial Philosophy"

The Changing Role of A Student, part 3

My studies on Judaism, German, Nazi Germany, Israel etc. gradually led into a study on theology across the board. It became another obsession.

It spanned everything. Hare Krishna midnight masses to Buddhist temples, from Mary Baker Eddy's Christian Science, months of studying with the Mormon "elders" (which would have been a shorter study, had I not seriously wanted to bed one of them, heh!), studies with the Jehovah Witnesses, with every imaginable Christian denomination, and a book-study on things that weren't easily available to me at the time (Hindu, Paganism, Islam, etc.).

I was a fairly intense Christian as a young teen, something I pursued on my own (not really via family). But by the time I was reaching adulthood, I had realized (the hard way) that most of my "intuitive beliefs" were not only in disagreement with my church but actual heresy, something that was pretty traumatic to all involved as I recall. I'd been the poster child for jesus, bringing friends and memorizing entire psalms and singing solos on sunday. What a sweet girl! Too bad we had to burn her at the stake.

Sigh.

I miss not being able to keep up my side of the debate with the JW's and Mormons at the door. Better yet, invite them in and let them debate each other. Damn. That's worth any amount of free lemonade and cookies for 'em, let me tell you. At one point I was a walking encyclopedia on so much theology I felt like my head was full. I read all the theology texbooks I got from a friend who majored in it in college, as well, so I was somewhat better educated than the average layman.

Oddly -- or not -- I found the more I studied it, the more wearying it was. At the end of the day, I just wanted to fall on my knees and tell God he was glorious and thank you for my life. All the other stuff... was just other stuff. Somehow I got less and less interested in religion, instead of moreso.

But, fortunately... more interested in a personal relationship with what I consider the divine. I call it God. Sometimes other things. The details aren't really important to me. I think human beings operate with a primary spiritual 'technology', for lack of a better word, that is 'personal relationship'. I think personalizing religious constructs is important and helpful.

This was followed and overlapped with a major personal study on cults, cultism, cult psychology, and all things of that ilk. Actually you can't help but run into that topic when you are studying religions, for obvious reasons, especially with the smaller ones. I found it all pretty fascinating, and I think in a different probability I probably ended up studying Sociology to a much greater degree.

Cult psychology as it turns out, tied right into later interests in hypnosis (the modalities have many things in common), so it was a good lead-in.

next up: part 4

You are feeling very sleepy

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